Curse

Vengeance · Jun 15, 2005, 08:21 PM // 20:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arbel

*munches on popcorn*

This is great stuff!

HEY HEY ... don't hog it all ... share some of that corn over here girl ...

All of these theatrics are interesting, I'll give you that ... but is it art?

chalt2 · Jun 15, 2005, 08:55 PM // 20:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dumb Quixote

I'm just tearing up thinking about it. But you did get the part of the "donkey dong" a bit confused... but that's understandable because you were so young when it happened (I'm sure you just blocked it out, frankly). Didn't you ever wonder why all your friends called you "Donkey Boy"? You *were* the strap on my friend... and boy did my mom hate it when your teeth came in. And that one day when you were passed out after the marathon session, I was merely trying to revive you after you fainted from exhaustion (sure, I shouldn't have bothered with CPR on someone so covered in bodily fluids, but I couldn't understand how your dad could leave you there like that). After that, we parted ways. But the thank-you card I got from your dad after bringing his half-dead, gimp son back to life lead me to believe it was your younger brother that visited the "hack" doctor for a little 'corrective surgery'. I mean, he said he always wanted a girl, and even though you cried like one every night he came by for his special visit, it really wasn't the same. I'm sure your therapist can help you get your memory sorted out... but if I were you I'd just be happy for the haze.

I knew that sometime down the road, the days your mom would stick you in the gas stove with the gas ON would come to haunt you. See you were only about six during all of this and I was about ten years older. The human strap-on you saw was NOT me but one of the midgets from the circus whom your mom was using as some kind of sexual pogo stick. When she got it stuck in her she of course called my dad who tried to get it out but could not and called me into try and help. When I arrived your mom was still riding the now dead body of Bert the she-man midget while dad was trying in vain to keep you from dipping the "super wide donkey dong" in the pools of bodily fluids that littered the floor, then doing your "hoover" routine on it. Also I am certain that the person you refered to as my "younger brother" is really you half sister that was born about 7 months after your mom got out of prison, we are all hopful that it is the product of an interlude with the guards, because calling it an "it" is being nice. I did faint when I first saw it that night, oh it was awful it looked like the product of a three way union between Michael Jackson, Big Foot and Rosanne Barr, it still haunts me to this day. Anyway after we extracted Bert you did start what looked like a re-enactment of an Emergency episode, you were rubbing on his chest, giving him mouth to mouth and trying to get his pants off which seemed a bit wierd but dad tossed the "donkey dong" over in the corner and just like that you were back over there sucking on it like an Astronaut in space without a helmet. So long story short we burried old Bert out in the woods with the dead 25 foot python ( another one of your moms "joyrides" ) and all went back to the bizare morbid lives that lead us to where we are today.
As you well know, your mom is my agent now and after my transformation we're going to hit the talkshow circuit and get this story out so the public can finally understand the sacrificies you made for science. She has shared with me that if she had it to do all over again she wouldn't have used the ether on you EVERY night to get you to put down the "dong" and go to sleep, she feels it has adversely effected you.

Dumb Quixote · Jun 15, 2005, 10:32 PM // 22:32

Sad, so sad. When I go to church tonight, your family and I will pray for your time at the Happy Homos Sanitarium in hopes the shock treatments start doing you some good. Obviously they've lit up your imagination like a cheap firework show, but if the treatment doesn't stop your fecal consumption, the doctors are sure you'll die (though I've heard them whispering about you during my visits, and many of them are thankful of you insatiable appetite for 'marble polishing' and how you make them forget their wives).

Don't worry, when the meds fail you and you are really at death's door, just look in the Bible I left for you last visit... I've hidden a razor blade in the binding in hope you end all our shame.

(are we done yet? My ADD is kicking in)

chalt2 · Jun 16, 2005, 12:28 AM // 00:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dumb Quixote

(are we done yet? My ADD is kicking in)

As evident by your feeble post ...

Dumb Quixote · Jun 16, 2005, 01:18 AM // 01:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by chalt2

As evident by your feeble post ...

And just about all of yours

Serafita Kayin · Jun 16, 2005, 02:41 AM // 02:41

THis is most definetely twisted.

No damn wonder the mods run away.

Dumb Quixote · Jun 16, 2005, 01:10 PM // 13:10

A little PvP never hurt anyone... it was all in fun, right Chalt?

chalt2 · Jun 16, 2005, 01:20 PM // 13:20

I enjoyed it

EnDinG · Jun 16, 2005, 01:21 PM // 13:21

I have to got say, blocks of text generally do scare me so I didn't read anything you guys posted. I saw a couple of big words and figured, "Too intelligent. I'll hurt my poor widdle head figuring out what they say.".

Arbel · Jun 16, 2005, 01:49 PM // 13:49

Didn't even last that long...soooooo dissapointed

Vengeance · Jun 16, 2005, 01:53 PM // 13:53

Can I come out now? Have the big posts gone away?

Since I'm just a little guy, blocks that big scare me ... they might crush me or something ...

Let's start the day with something bizarre! Ummmm ... what's in your packed lunch for the day? I haven't checked yet ... it's going to be a surprise!

Alzbeta · Jun 16, 2005, 02:04 PM // 14:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vengeance

Can I come out now? Have the big posts gone away?

Same here. I didn't read any of that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vengeance

Let's start the day with something bizarre! Ummmm ... what's in your packed lunch for the day? I haven't checked yet ... it's going to be a surprise!

I brought Stouffer's chicken tenders and cheesy potato bake. Mmmm!

Vengeance · Jun 16, 2005, 02:09 PM // 14:09

I just looked ... it seems to be some kind of noodle contraption ... with ... possibly ... sausage? Hmmm ... pudding ... apple ... and what's that underneath all that ...

*gasp*

DOESN'T MATTER 'BOUT THE REST CUZ MY GF PUT IN A SPIDER MAN NAPKIN FOR ME TO USE!!! She LUUUUUUVS me!!!

chalt2 · Jun 16, 2005, 02:23 PM // 14:23

Its a Chipotle day!

Dumb Quixote · Jun 16, 2005, 02:34 PM // 14:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vengeance

Can I come out now? Have the big posts gone away?

Since I'm just a little guy, blocks that big scare me ... they might crush me or something ...

Let's start the day with something bizarre! Ummmm ... what's in your packed lunch for the day? I haven't checked yet ... it's going to be a surprise!

You mean someone packs your lunch? That's... cute.

I pack my own lunch (Which in married speak means I'm going out for lunch).

chalt2 · Jun 16, 2005, 03:04 PM // 15:04

ANIMAL!, ANIMAL!

Lol nice change to the Av Veng, I also liked Archie!

Swampgirl Inez · Jun 16, 2005, 03:08 PM // 15:08

I didn't bring my lunch... it's raid the office fridge day.

EnDinG · Jun 16, 2005, 03:10 PM // 15:10

Peanut butter sandwhich, a pepsi, and some oreo's with chocolate fudge in them.

I'm hungrey so I might eat them now and go out for something else... *Ponders* KFC, Harveys or Subway...

Might be Harveys, dying for poutine.

Vengeance · Jun 16, 2005, 03:10 PM // 15:10

Thanks ... had to fix the timing on the 'pounce' ...

'No Kermit, I don't think you understand ... Animal bowls OVERHAND' - Floyd
'STRIKE!!! STRIKE!!!' - Animal

Vengeance · Jun 16, 2005, 06:30 PM // 18:30

This was starting to drop near the bottom ... gotta keep it near the top for 'Bel's sake ...

And just so that I don't get a big ol finger pointed at me for doing something silly like bumping ... errr ...

I like to eat paint ... not paint chips ... I like to dip a brush in a nice can of lavender and just suck that baby dry ... mmmm mmm ...